Taking a moment to reflect on Abdul’s American Idol run, you may come across a few flops, flounders, tears and cheers. You may even develop a random drug addiction but nonetheless, you will smile—either laughing with her or laughing at her. To recap, Idol gave Paula the boot and the lonesome seat in between Randy and that other chick is up for grabs. Who better than one of these celeb’s to fill her shoes, and take over the task of bickering with Simon. 

1. Lil’ Kim

With 15 years in the game who better than the Notorious K.I.M to take the throne. With the help of auto-tune Kimmy sings just as well as Paula did in the 80′s and dresses just as tacky. Who wouldn’t tune in every week to see Kim and Simon go at it (No pun intended!)?

2. Joe Jackson 

Given the credit for literally whipping the Jackson 5 and Michael Jackson into the icons they are, Joe would fit right into the Idol atmosphere; at the end of the day they’d actually be worth listening to. Maybe this will keep him away from meddling into Michael’s estate.

3. Frankie

If Paula can prosper in such a loved franchise while managing to still suffer from an addiction, why can’t clean and sober Frankie? She can dance better than Paula, stay awake, and hold a conversation.

4. P.Diddy

Mr. Making the Band himself. American Idol loves characters confidence and critique and he embodies all of the C’s(plus and extra for Cassie) they look for in a judge. These new idols will know how to dance, rap, sing fight, and know every word to B.I.G’s album. 

5. Toya

After hanging onto her ex-husbands coat-tails a little too long Toya needs to make a living by other means. I don’t care if she can’t sing, dance, act or juggle—she needs a job and a position is open, so I’m submitting in her application.