This week, take a trip to the grindhouse without leaving your living room with Zombie Strippers and Hell Ride; learn about the time Bob Dylan discovered Jesus in the doc Bob Dylan’s Jesus Years; and celebrate 20 years of snark with Mystery Science Theater 3000: 20th Anniversary Edition.

Zombie Strippers
Sony
$24.96

Hell Ride
The Weinstein Company
$19.97

In an alternate universe, where the Robert Rodriguez/Quentin Tarantino double-feature Grindhouse was a big hit instead of a major belly-flop, Zombie Strippers and Hell Ride probably would have served as the line-up for Grindhouse 2.  Like Planet Terror and Death Proof, these movies are 21st century glosses on famous ’70s exploitation genres, namely the zombie flick and the biker picture.  Also like their predecessors, both films are mixed bags, offering some inspired moments amidst uneven screenplays
and awkward performances.

Zombie Strippers will probably find the bigger audience on DVD, if only because it stars ex-porn star Jenna Jameson as one of the titular pole dancers…which means she still gets to show off all her naughty bits for the camera, but doesn’t have to put any of them to use.  Would you really be surprised if I said that Jameson is a terrible actress?  Well, she is.  The good thing is that writer/director Jay Lee must have recognized that, because he makes her the first victim of his zombie rampage.  Clever guy that he is, Lee finds a way to keep Jameson around (and in a state of undress) following her demise so that her fans don’t switch off the DVD at the 30-minute mark.  The conceit of Zombie Strippers is that Jameson and her fellow strippers actually become better at their jobs after they’re transformed into flesh-eating monsters.  Their wild gyrations make the horny male patrons so hot and bothered, they willingly become zombie food.  It’s a funny idea that zombie movie godfather George Romero probably would have appreciated.  Unfortunately, Lee can’t come up with a good story to hang his premise on.  After getting off to a decent start, the movie settles into a rut that it never shakes itself out of.  While you could chalk this up to the perils of working on a low budget, that argument falls apart when you remember that Romero faced many of the same financial challenges on his zombie pictures and look how well those turned out.  No, the real reason Zombie Strippers fails is because Lee never got beyond the “Wouldn’t it be cool if…” stage of his screenplay.

Story is also the big thing missing from Hell Ride, the largely nonsensical tale of a biker gang that roars around on massive hogs fighting each other and rival bands of motorcycle enthusiasts.  Writer/director Larry Bishop also serves as the film’s star and it’s hilarious—not too mention really sad—to see this middle-aged son of Hollywood royalty (his dad is comedian Joey Bishop) act out his fantasies on someone else’s (in this case producer Quentin Tarantino’s) dime.  Bishop plays Pistolero, the grizzled leader of a pack that also includes Michael Madsen and Eric Balfour.  Pistolero is on a seemingly never-ending mission to find the killers of his girlfriend Cherokee Kissum, killed decades ago by another biker gang.  Now his quest finally seems to be nearing its end…provided he’s able to avoid death at the hands of the Six Six Six’s, led by former footballer Vinnie Jones.  Trust me, that makes the film sound much more comprehensible than it actually is.  But then plot really isn’t Bishop’s main focus; he’s more interested in getting his hands on as many nubile twenty-year-old biker gals as he possibly can.  The movie’s highlight (or, if you prefer, its nadir) is an impromptu threesome that finds three gals literally begging the craggy-faced Bishop to satisfy their needs.  Uh huh, sure Larry…you bet.  Hell Ride does offer some fun moments—particularly whenever crazy Dennis Hopper shows up to chew some scenery—but for my mental well-being, I kinda wish Bishop had never been given the opportunity to put his fantasy life onscreen.

Extras: Zombie Strippers arrives on DVD with a commentary track featuring Jameson and the film’s producer and director, as well as roughly 45 minutes of deleted and extended scenes and two making-of featurettes.  Hell Ride also sports a director yak track and five behind-the-scenes docs, profiling the movie’s many motorbikes and hot babes.

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Inside Bob Dylan’s Jesus Years: Busy Being Born…Again!
MVD
$14.95

Most movies about Bob Dylan (both documentaries and I’m Not There-style experimental adventures) tend to focus on the folk singer-to-rock-icon transformation he underwent in the early ’60s, stopping with his near-fatal brush with death in a 1966 motorcycle accident.  And while that period in his life is endlessly fascinating, the 30-year period that followed is also worthy of exploration.  Case in point: Dylan’s sudden conversion to Christianity in 1978, which stunned his fans and flummoxed music critics.  The singer/songwriter recorded three gospel albums during his roughly three-year Christian phase, beginning with 1978′s Slow Train Coming and concluding with 1981′s Shot of Love.  In addition, he went on an around-the-world tour where he was often confronted by jeering audiences—some of whom were the same listeners that cheered him when he made the controversial move from folk to rock.

It’s an extraordinary chapter in Dylan’s storied career and it deserves a better film than Bob Dylan’s Jesus Years, a meandering, mediocre documentary from filmmaker Joel Gilbert.  Blocked from speaking with Dylan himself—or from using any of his actual music—Gilbert instead draws the bulk of his material from his former pastor, music producer Jerry Wexler (who oversaw his gospel records) and an assortment of backup singers and musicians who played with him during that time.  This still could have yielded an informative movie…if the director had any idea what to ask his subjects.  But Gilbert proves a washout as an interviewer, often reading his questions directly off index cards while on-camera and never asking any follow-ups.  His library of B-roll footage is also embarrassingly limited—he re-uses the same five minutes of one live show over and over again because he simply doesn’t have anything else to cut away to.  I guess Gilbert deserves some credit for at least opening the door to this period of Dylan’s life—now another filmmaker needs to come along and do it better.

Extras: A fifteen-minute look at Dylan’s 1978 World Tour and a short featurette about an all-star performance he gave for imprisoned boxer Ruben “Hurricane” Carter in 1976.

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Mystery Science Theater 3000: 20th Anniversary Edition
Shout! Factory
$59.98

What’s more fun that talking back to the screen during bad movies?  Nothing!  And that’s exactly why Mystery Science Theater 3000 remains one of the greatest TV series ever broadcast.  During its decade-long run—first on a public-access station in Minneapolis then on Comedy Central and finally on the Sci Fi Channel—the crew of the intrepid crew of the Satellite Of Love ridiculed dozens and dozens of Z-grade movies from the ’40s, ’50s, ’60s and ’70s.  In fact, if the show were still on the air, it’s likely that Zombie Strippers and Hell Ride would be lampooned in the not-too-distant future.  Although the interstitial skits mixed into the episodes were never particularly great, the actual talking-back-to-the-screen part was always comedy gold.  At one point, the popularity of the show actually led to an MST3K feature film…but the result wasn’t quite as great as fans hoped.  Since the show went off the air in 1999, DVD sets have been coming out fairly regularly, but this 20th anniversary edition offers four titles that haven’t made their way to disc yet, including First Spaceship on Venus, Laserblast, Werewolf and Future War.  And if you need further convincing that this set is worth the $60 price tag, just take a gander at the bonus features below…

Extras: The highlight of this 20th anniversary release has to be the three-part, 90-minute documentary that explores the complete history of MST3K, from its humble public-access origins to its final years on cable.  Packed with revealing interviews and vintage behind-the-scenes footage, it’s almost as entertaining as an actual episode.  Also included is the MST3K Reunion Panel from this summer’s Comic Con, lobby cards and a small figurine of the show’s signature cranky critic, Crow T. Robot.

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Also on DVD

You’d think that the presence of Guy Pearce and Oscar winner Catherine Zeta-Jones would be enough to get a movie a sizeable theatrical release, but that wasn’t the case with Death Defying Acts (Genius Products, $19.97), which passed through a few art-houses last summer, but never crossed over into multiplexes.  Pearce stars as legendary illusionist Harry Houdini, who finds himself falling for a beautiful psychic played by the still ravishing Zeta-Jones.  But are the psychic’s feelings genuine or is she attempting to trick one of the 20th centuries leading tricksters?  Red (Magnolia, $26.98) is another film that only played a few theaters on its way to DVD, despite a powerhouse lead performance by reliable character actor Brian Cox, best known stateside for his role in the second X-Men movie.  Cox plays an aging small-town good ol’ boy, who goes all Death Wish on a trio of young morons after they make the mistake of killing his beloved pooch.  Although the movie gets more than a little improbable in the final act, Cox is great throughout—Hollywood, cast him in more stuff please!

Bypassing theaters completely is Tinker Bell (Disney, $29.99), a direct-to-DVD CGI cartoon feature starring Peter Pan’s faithful fairy sidekick.  Perhaps a better title would have been Tinker Bell Begins as the movie takes place in the days before Tink met Pete, when she was just another resident of Pixie Hollow.  The vocal cast includes Mae Whitman as Tinkerbell, along with Raven-Symoné, America Ferrera, Lucy Liu and Anjelica Huston and the DVD includes such kid-friendly bonus features as DVD-Rom games and a music video by Disney Channel singer Serena Gomez.  Look for more Tinker Bell adventures to follow next year.

In documentary news, Annie Leibovitz: Life Through a Lens (Warner Bros., $19.98) provides a comprehensive look at the life of the famed photographer, best known for her shots of celebrities like John Lennon and a pregnant Demi Moore.  Wonder if Miley Cyrus agreed to talk about her controversial photo shoot as well?  Meanwhile, The Vampire Princess (Infinity, $14.98) traces the roots of the Dracula legend not to Romanian tyrant Vlad the Impaler but a Czech princess named Eleonore von Schwarzenberg, who was supposedly Bram Stoker’s primary influence in penning his now-classic novel.

Turning to TV, fans of the cancelled sci-fi series The 4400 will never get the closure they deserve—USA axed the show before the writers had a chance to tie up all the loose ends—but at least all four seasons, plus the miniseries that started it all can be found in one place with The 4400: The Complete Series (CBS, $99.98).  This hefty box set also includes commentary tracks, deleted scenes and new featurettes, which hopefully spill the details on where the series would have gone if it had been allowed to continue.  Finally, Sony continues to re-issue complete runs of classic TV shows in handy box sets.  The studio’s newest batch of titles include ’70s staples Good Times: The Complete Series and
Sanford and Son: The Complete Series, as well as the brilliant ’90s sitcom NewsRadio: The Complete Series ($59.95 each).  All of the extras released on previous editions are intact here—the main benefit of these all-in-one sets is being able to save on shelf space, which is a pretty good bonus feature if you ask me.

GIANT: Have you always wanted to be an actress?

Pretty much. I started by playing Michael Darling in Peter Pan when I was in second grade.

How’d that go?

Oh, my god. It was the highlight of my life up until then. I got to wear those one-piece pajamas with the feet. Mine was blue, and it had Winnie the Pooh on it.

How did you get cast as a boy?

I really don’t know. I was a big tomboy. I wanted to be one of the Lost Boys for reasons I don’t know. Then I wound up getting the part of Michael Darling. I guess we had more girls than boys, and Peter Pan is, like, all boys.

Where are your people from?

They’re Chickasaw from Northern Mississippi. That’s my dad’s side.

What about your mom?

My mom is from Connecticut. I grew up in Boston.

Talk about Hell Ride and your character in that film.

The movie’s about this biker gang. I play [Cherokee Kissum] the former lover of Larry Bishop’s character, and I get killed by their rival gang a long time ago. They are trying to avenge my death. She’s the emotional driving force of the plot. She’s all in flashbacks, which tell that story of why the characters are doing what they’re doing.

This film is very much like Grindhouse. And there’s so much tits and ass in the film. Are you comfortable with that?

Cherokee Kissum is the only female role besides maybe one other in the film that I would have been comfortable playing. She isn’t just tits and ass. She wasn’t a conquest. She was very important to these people. They respected her. It was important to tell her story because otherwise the movie wouldn’t work.

Who is your character on ER this season?

Kaya Montoya. She’s a medical student. Also, she’s Native American. When she comes in, people underestimate her. She actually has a lot of experience.

You get some great character names.

That’s because I’m an Indian. But Cherokee Kissum is the best name ever. I will never have a better name than that.

Do you get a romance?

I have no idea. They’re so secretive. They don’t tell you anything.

Do you get to make out with John Stamos?

Everyone asks that. He’s involved with Linda Cardellini’s character. So there needs to be some time for that to unravel.

How weird is it to come onto a long-running show for its final season?

There are people who are on that set who have been there every day for pretty much fifteen years. And they can tell you anything that happened, any day, any year. They’re walking almanacs. I’ve never felt so much pressure acting ever before. It’s so demanding saying words with more syllables. You don’t know what they are, and you don’t know what they mean, but you’re cutting someone open at the same time. You’ve gotta act and emote and do something besides just saying your lines properly.

How much do you have to learn?

Everybody I’m sure takes a different amount on themselves about what they actually want to learn about what they’re doing. You could just read your lines. Literally. But it’s such an incredible opportunity having all these doctors on set. It’s just such a great opportunity to ask questions and learn about the human anatomy. The hardest scene that I’ve had was this procedure called preperitoneal packing. You had to cut the woman open at her stomach and literally take these big pieces of gauze and stuff them all the way down into her stomach, up to your elbows. That’s sort of what it looks like. There’s blood everywhere, and you’re saying these incredible lines like, “Super-pubic incision” and “Keep the peritoneal intact.”

What are you doing on the set to make it look real?

You’re totally freaking out. It’s total mayhem. You go through a series of rehearsals, which is actually really helpful. A doctor explains what every word means, what every [tool] you’re using does, how you hold it, where you put it just so you have a sense of what you’re doing, so it makes sense in your head. He does that with each actor one on one. Then all the actors in the scene come in, and he checks you together. That’s like choreography. You pass things to people, and it all happens so fast, and everyone has to be exactly on it. Then you get the words down, and there’s two more rehearsals for the director and for the crew. It’s a very gradual, building-blocks process. Then once you’ve gone through all that, it’s just do or die. Just totally cross your fingers and go. You can’t think about what you’re going to do. You just do it.

Do you get more than one shot at it?

Yeah, but the show moves so fast. One of the hardest things too is lots of times you’ll get a lot of blood on you, so in between the setups it’s so nuts. The setup people and props people are taking everything that’s bloody off and putting new ones on so you can start again. The doctors come up to you saying, “You emphasized the fourth syllable of this seven-syllable word. You should actually be emphasizing the second.” The director comes over saying, “I think you need to pay a little more attention to some aspect of someone else’s performance.” Then the cinematographer is coming over saying, “You gotta stand like two inches to the right and tilt your head up.” It’s overwhelming.

What do you personally keep in mind so that it looks like you know what you’re doing?

You have to go for it in a way that you usually aren’t conscious of having to do with acting. It’s so daunting if you think about all the stuff you have to remember and the things you have to do in a short time. And you don’t get many takes. But you just have to have confidence. You have to believe that you know it all and that you belong there and that you can do this. Because if you second-guess yourself, you’re dead.