How Ne-Yo Knows Women. Intimately. Biblically.

A long, long time ago, a year we’ll call 2007, the now impeccably gentlemanly Ne-Yo’s name couldn’t be mentioned without the attached term—“sex addict.” Since supplanted by the floppy-haired likes of David “Californicate Your Way to Rehab” Duchovny, Ne-Yo has gone to release “Miss Independent” a catchy, piquantly percussive song about female empowerment. Nympho rumors aside, Ne-Yo not only clearly loves women, he KNOWS them because his version of the “boss lady” is exactly how a boss lady would like to be seen. I’m no music critic, and while other syrupy, girly jams miss the mark entirely, as a woman, this effort succeeds because of the bumbling lyrical honesty.

According to Ne-Yo, this unmarried, female, “effortlessly fly” shot-caller always has an immaculately matching mani/pedi, has almost paid off her car, the mortgage on her property and her favorite phrase is “Don’t worry, I got it.” In fact, this woman loves to handle BI to the extent that he refrains “she said, she got it,” four additional times. He then croons over and over, as if hypnotized by his own mantra that,  ”She got her own thing, that’s why I love her.” Meanwhile, her interest level remains vague and he deliberately avoids saying that she “needs” anything from him. It’s genius.

Now, this may sound sexist and stereotypish but I think I know this woman. She’s constantly harangued by her parents about no impending nuptials, her siblings have long since married whilst getting their respective master’s degrees, she has gone on date after baffling date with a holes and d bags with little promise and is now, finally, ripe for this dude who just LOVES that he doesn’t have to do squat. He thinks driving this union will require zero steering from him and he is THRILLED. This is a man who is looking forward to early retirement and is eyeing her superior healthcare coverage [wait a second, a $10 dental copay? Amazing!]. “Everything she got best believe she bought it”? It’s like he’s openly admitting to his affections being included among such hard-won belongings. I love that! Isn’t honesty romantic? I think so. Plus, the beat is crazy.